Lodestone TLR-99

Where sides don't matter

"Alright honey, let's go over it again and see if any of that stuck," said Kath, shutting the dusty spiral notebook on the desk as she looked Mehr in the eyes. "The northern nation is...?"

"A bunch of bastards," Mehr finished.

Kath's face went flat. "They have a name, and that name is...?"

"Mud."

"Kerlaugar. They're the Viscountcy of Kerlaugar," Kath corrected. "And we're technically living on their border, so you're going to have to learn not to dismiss their refugees out of hand."

"We're living in a bomb shelter made of repurposed pillboxes and supply tunnels, in a base that we blew to kingdom fuck years ago," said Mehr with only the barest hint of complaint. "Personally. We were there."

"We were acting on orders, Mehr. Orders that we've since forsaken. We defend this place now, and all of its refugees. South or North doesn't matter here. Only innocents and those who would threaten them."

"I realize that, but it's because of the damn North that this place is in such rotten shape to begin with."

"The damn North, you say. Whose greatest crime was, let me check--" Kath made a gesture of flipping through her notebook very fast-- "defending themselves against the impending assault by the Sunnr Army?"

Mehr slammed a hand on the table between them. "They're not innocent, damn it!"

"Neither were we, and that's why we're here now!" shouted Kath. "And there's so many refugees and innocents here that just happened to be from the North that I want to make sure you're not going to piss them off by saying the wrong thing to a client!"

"You have any idea how hard this shit is for me?"

"I know it all too well, remember? We were in the same unit in boot camp, we both got the drills and the screaming and the programming."

"So how come you're fine and I'm a nervous wreck?" Her eyes began to develop a wet shine.

"I'm gonna let you in on a secret, honey. I'm not fine. I only stopped myself from having a complete breakdown by latching on to the only person that was doing worse than me. Who was there with me, even when she wasn't. I'd checked out from being the perfect little soldier as soon as I knew they thought I was irreplaceable. I didn't keep an infraction log, never showed up to KP duty, and I'm sure you remember that thing with the washing machine and the Colonel's mess uniform."

"And they still let you be the star. The hero pilot." Mehr's voice betrayed a hint of jealousy that, while no longer relevant, still hurt her.

"I kept telling them what they wanted to hear, any time they'd ask me up front. You remember all that shitty loyalty pledge daily affirmation stuff from boot camp? I got real good at repeating it back to them even though I never believed it."

Mehr remembered so well that it felt like the loyalty pledge had overwritten a portion of her childhood. I am a subject of the Sunnr Principality. My value to the South is in my own strength. I will use my strength, and all of my strength, in service to the South.

"Think about it. Your thoughts about geopolitics aren't your own. They're a template, that was fed to us all by the drill sergeants and COs. They wanted our undying loyalty, so they'd hammer into us what we were supposed to be feeling. And they especially preyed on impressionable young minds like mine and yours. They'd have us believe that our cities were great and powerful, and the North's cities were built on matchsticks and prayers so their nobility could pour the tax money into... I dunno, gold velvet whoopee cushions or some shit."

Mehr was noticeably shaking in her chair, failing to hold back her tears any more. "A-and I'm just supposed to stop thinking those things because we made enemies of them? I'm supposed to buy in to the monarchist garbage that the North would feed us?"

"It's all the same monarchy, all the way up. Sunnr and Kerlaugar? They all answer to the High Queen at the end of the day. Hell, I'd bet money they're all related."

"So what the hell do we do, if both of them are awful?"

"We reject them both. This place is a symbol of autonomy. We're not a part of their squabbling. If they're the ones that would fight each other to prove that they're building the better cities for the better people, then we'd just as soon live in this hole in the ground to prove them wrong."